Was working in a busy country town today with a work colleague 'S', we had an hour to kill before the next client arrived. It was wet miserable morning... the cafe was full of fat builders in ill-fitting shirts and too-big-on-the-butt trousers with egg and tomato sauce dripping down their stubby chins. Grossed me out so much I insisted on leaving! There wasn't anything else to do apart from walk in the rain...
On the Square there was a camper van parked advertising Gypsy Lee 'AS SEEN ON TV' Psychic Clairvoyant Palm Readings, Crystal Ball and Tarot Cards... These weren't your standard handmade/painted posters they were real professional print job with numerous photos of the said fortune teller with various stars and celebrities. Neither of us had heard of her but we were still suitable impressed (mind you 'S' hadn't a clue who Paul Newman was either!) so in we went.
S, who opted for a Crystal Ball reading for €30, came out 11 mins later smiling but still looking a tad disappointed. She felt the reading was general but pretty vague; the woman instantly assumed that she was in a relationship (which she was) and predicted that she would marry him eventually (S was kinda disappointed with this for some reason!) have 3 children in quick succession and give up her job temporarily to mind them. She predicted correctly that there were 4 other members in her family that she was close to (true) and she had 3 close friends that she can count on and go far with (S is off on holidays this Saturday with 2 girlfriends while the other best friend is taking her camping next month... )
Still S was disappointed... no magical dark knight of romance, no scandal to make her famous, or lotto wins to look forward to... just life as she already knew it: boring humdrum day-to-day life.
I went in and asked for the tarot reading (they are cards...) for €40 as I was feeling a little flush after last night's cash win. I was determined not give any telling answers to leading questions such tellers usually ask.
As I sat down at the other side of the caravan with the fortune teller, she immediately asked me a common job related question for a "friend" of hers... I put it down to the fact that S might have told her what we worked at and replied with the usual doled out advice that we are trained to give. Later S swore blind that the subject of our work never came up... Hmmm!?
The gypsy asked me why I picked the cards, and not the crystal ball like S, not wanting to mention poker I thought of 'S' and mumbled something about a previous crystal ball reading I had been disappointed with. They she made me jump...
"Do you play cards m'dear?" she had a deep husky voice and her irises shone yellow with brown specks reminding me of a cat. Huh? I swear I never touched the deck! I had no poker memorabllia or similar on myself... I looked puzzled and asked 'why she thought that?' but she didn't reply to me just spread the cards and asked me to pick any 5 and make a wish in my heart.
"Have you ever given any thought to fostering or adoption?" perhaps in the past... "well I see you doing it in future; fostering a child then adopting them... I see you with 3 children of your own too... 2 girls and a boy... the boy will be born first followed by two girls..." I got goosebumps hearing this! I already have a son and daughter, my son is the oldest. But I SWEAR I have no plans to have a 3rd!!! The very thought has me very worried right now!
"I see you surrounded by lots of children... does your job have any involvement with children?" Yes, spot on... "they will grow up to work alongside you in the future... " Hope it's not in poker or their parents won't thank me!
"You are looking for a partner, is that right my dear?" Ah ha! Another leading question! I stared at the cards I picked looking for the 'male figure' that sprung the question - not one card had a male figure. "You may know him already my dear... you may have turned him down once already; don't do it a second time... his initial is P or C" pfffft! I assure all my admirers that there's no 'P' or 'C' in my life, and I've not turned down anyone for a date recently! I bet Susie Woosie is already making a mental list here(!)
"Do you worry about money dear?" Who doesn't! I have a mortgage, a job that involves a lot of travelling and an expensive hobby (no I didn't tell her that!) But she predicts that I will never be 'rich' I will know tight times but I will come into a fair sum of money at various occasions in my life (of course... poker winnings!) and my home will always be luxurious (of course... thanks to my poker winnings!) and welcoming (Did I tell ya about my plan to buy a poker table with wooden top for the dining room with my 'next big win! Just bring a bottle and some cash over with you...) "you will never be in a position to ask for help... as long as you spend wisely" Amen to that!
"I see you climbing the ladder in your career my dear" I nodded, I'm actively working on that one right now and I incorporated it into my 'wish'... "am I right that you wished for career success?" Cue another goosebump moment. "The cards say it will come to you, all in good time my dear..."
There were other messages about my life that rang eeriely true to form in my 20 minute reading... but I digress sharing them for now.
Before I went in - I gave my bag to S, having already taken the €40 from my wallet and tucking it inside my shirt (in my defence I had no pockets... I blame Susie Woosie for giving me this habit!) I was told of a fortune teller years ago who put her children under the table to rob unsuspecting clients of their cash as they placed their handbag on the floor... now Gypsy Lee looked too old to have small children and I had a clear view under the table so it was unlikely to happen but I wasn't taking any chances!
"You can take your money out of your bra, its quite safe here my dear..." Impossible! How did she know???!!! I felt more goosebumps. No... The woman must have CCTV cameras or something!?! I laughed and paid her dues as she chanted the gypsy blessing over the cash in my palm. I just hope she was praying to the deities for it to double up for me than forgiveness for scamming me so well!
IF it was a scam that is, cos she was so good, accurate or scarily close enough to be! Unlike my colleague 'S' bemoaning her 'humdrum' life ... I must admit I'd be very happy if my life turns out the way as predicted!
2 comments:
Ha - sounded like fun - for the record, i ain't "S" :P
I treat mediums/fortune tellers with a bit of salt and if they say something thats eerily true or resembles truth - i put it down to a nice coincidence
Cool though... although remember "Larry" the medium at my place - "Slow down, don't close the door, your granny is coming in behind you..." - ha, that was cool!
No you most def ain't 'S' (you know damn well who Paul Newman is at least!!!!) LOL! We had a client today who was the dead ringer for 60 year old version of Newman - right down to the peircing beautiful blue eyes, aging blonde hair... and sexy stance! I nearly suggested to him to join a 'look-a-like' agency!!!
Awww I forgot about Larry the medium... telling me to leave the door open for the 'little grey haired lady running hard trying to keep up'. Still shocked he described my granny to a 'T' right down to her name(!) "Alice... Alice... was she scottish? Did her surname begin with Mac?" Whoa!
Post a Comment